Really Trying...

A little confused

What to do, what to do

Thinking too much

I'm turning blue

Hate it when I'm like his

But I don't think there's a way

I wish to be happy

As I always pray

I do my best

But it just doesn't last

I don't want to go back

And be the "me" in the past

Sometimes I think

I want to be null

But then again

Everything would go dull

I try laughing with my friends

Hanging out at school

Playing games

But later back to drool

I tried listening to music

Even tried singing myself

I try reading books

Then return to the shelf

After trying and trying

I'm all worn out

Then my friends would ask me

"What's it all about?"

Then I keep silent

with no replies

Telling them it's nothing

But all are lies

I start to lose

My Self-confidence

And start to lose the faith

I have on my friends

I try to be happy

I really do

But then I think

Who really cares, who??